STOP THE DOMESTIC ABUSE & MURDERS - One woman in Australia dies every week

Australia, let's stand up and be counted. The murder of Hannah and her children is an unspeakable act that will resonate within our community forever.

It is time the the scourge of domestic violence against WOMEN was STOPPED. YES, WOMEN - young woman and young children who are being systematically abused across Australia. The abuse escalates and we have a family set on fire in a car and murdered.

OUR NATION HAS WITNESSED THE WORST HORROR IMAGINABLE.

DVO's against these male perpetrators do not work. I have seen this personally and we all have witnessed it this week. I could go on.

As a grandmother and mother, for the first time im my life I was met by a cop, pointing a gun at me and my husband, as he attended our distress call to a domestic violence incident some years ago but it has lived with me. We have faced - disbelief, incompetence, arrogance, dismissive attitudes, and the total lack of empathy and action by authorities.

Hundreds of thousands of dollars are spent futilely by families in the FAMILY COURT. The system is failing our women and children. There should be a royal commission so that all of the families bitten by the legal financial monster can give evidence.

It has been stated that the alcoholic, drug addicted male has reformed. "He's okay now!"

Men with control issues are not seen as dangerous and for whatever reason many males do not realise that their behaviour is damaging. This needs to be confronted.

Years down the track we have seen the damage done by the "okay males".

IT HAS TO STOP.

PARTNER OR MARITAL SEPARATION causes anxiety, depression and great financial distress. It also causes great sadness and grief to those involved.

Since when has HOMICIDAL killing of women and children because of family separation become the norm?

The pretence that these MALES are okay or will CHANGE has to STOP. WOMEN have to be believed before NEXT week . We are on course for another Australian woman to die at the hands of her partner.

STOP QUOTING STATISTICS. START TAKING ACTION.

IT IS TOO LATE ONCE THE VICTIMS ARE DEAD

WARNING SIGNS

There are warning signs and women do know these signs. The women are distressed and eventually accepting as they often feel helpless and are unable to stop the continual invasion into their life of their ex partner. They are often too frightened to make a report and believe that no action will be taken.

What are the warning signs that women do not report and try to ignore?

1. Actual physical harm of the woman or physical attempts to restrict movement - physical abuse.

2.Sexual Abuse.

3. Abusive text messages - psychological violence.

4. Abusive phone calls - .psychological violence

5. Name calling and denigration of the woman - psychological violence

6. Continual stalking and invasion of the woman's new living space - uninvited visits - intimidation.

7. Abuse of the woman at pickups and drop downs at custody visits - coersive control

8. Verbal abuse of the children at pick ups and set downs to exert control and upset the mother - coersive control.

9 Attempted control of the woman's life by never being on time for custody visits or not even bothering to turn up at designated times - coersive control.

10.. Attempted control of the woman's life by threatening harm - coersive control.

11. Financial intimidation by refusal to pay educational and ancilliary costs of raising children and tryng to keep their expartner in poverty- coersive control

12. Denigrating and blaming the extended family of their partner.

13. Exhibiting rage often for no reason - swearing, yelling and screaming - psychological control

14 Threatening self harm - manipulative and psychilogical control.

15. Interrogation and manipulation of the children and denigration of the mother to the children - attempted control at numerous levels.

16 Atitudinal response to Family Court decisions - they believe they are a law unto them selves and that they do no have to follow court orders - demonstrates humiliated fury at loss of control..

What can we do to keep our women and children safe?

FAMILY ACTION

Every family needs to be proactive in supporting and protecting their daughters and children/grandchildren who find themselves in an abusive and dangerous situation. Be decisive and ensure protection. Obviously the system and infrastructure within our community isn't working. DO NOT RELY ON THE SYSTEM TO PROTECT YOU.

1. Secure accommodation that is "totally secure" and unknown to the expartner.

2. Keep a diary of all incidents - particularly of all abusive messages and phone calls.

3. Ensure that your narrative to the court and to the police states that you and your children are frightened and in imminent danger of harm.

4. Report all incidents to the police.

5. Once custody is determined - pick ups and drop downs should be in a neutral location with a third person as intermediary.

6. Inform the educational faciity of the family issues - if threats escalate change the school.

7. Do not be silenced by intimidating authorities.

REFORM REQUIRED

1. Authorities should treat this as an "out of contol" NATIONAL ISSUE.

2. Funding should be immediately increased to all Family Services involved in domestic violence.

3. Set up a special Police Unit throughout our communities that deals only with Domestic Violence.

4. The consequences for reported perpetrators should be swift and certain. There should be no excuses for inappropraite behaviour and no leniency. DO NOT EXCUSE THEIR BEHAVIOUR. FAST RESPONSE is needed.

5. Immediate exploration of the history and type of behaviours should be undertaken and the perpetrator detained.

6. Unsafe responses should be negated. Safety should be the main priority.

7. Holistic support for women should be an immediate priority.

8. Referral to relationship courses for an abused women are ludicrous. Forcing a woman who is abused to reassess her relationship is also ludicrous and reeks of a failure to recognise the abused victim.

9. Any breech of court orders should be immediately met with detention.

10. Any breech of a DVO should be viewed seriously. These actions are a blatant refusal to accept the law of the land and a RED FLAG.

The time for discussion is over. It is time for ACTION.

IT IS TIME TO ACKNOWLEGE THAT ANY OF THIS TYPE OF TOXIC BEHAVIOUR IS UNACCEPTABLE AND OUR WOMEN AND THE FAMILIES OF THESE WOMEN SHOULD SPEAK UP AND MORE IMPORTANTLY BE HEARD.

HELP PHONE:1800RESPECT